We admitted to ourselves, the Goddess and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
What reservations do I have about working step five? I fear misunderstanding and miscommunication on the matters of my addiction, my Higher Power and my cowardice. I fear judgment and confusion. I don't feel entirely understood and I fear losing trust or respect.
Do I have any fears at this point? What are they? I don't want to go to rehab. I don't want to admit the full extent of my addiction to my family. I feel like they don't need to know. I wouldn't lie, but I'm not exactly presenting the information, either.
What am I doing to work through my fears about doing the fifth step? I'm sucking it up and doing it anyway, no matter how uncomfortable I get. If I cry, oh well.
How has working the first four steps prepared me to work the fifth step? It has certainly made clear the wrongs I have committed and exactly what I need to do in order to face them.
Sharing the nastiest parts of myself is terrifying, because it takes a remarkable amount of trust. I'm pretty sure I can trust Elaine, but its that fear of getting burned again. Then again, I have nothing to hide anymore, which I suppose is why this is on a public blog. I am open and honest in my doings and will not willingly tell a lie. If I speak, it must be true, it must be kind and it must be necessary.
I know who you are, it wasn't that hard just to figure you out
~GHOST MUTHAFUCKA
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