Saturday, September 21, 2013

Step Seven: Getting Out of the Way

We Humbly Asked Her to Remove Our Shortcomings


How does the spiritual principle of surrender apply to getting out of the way so a Higher Power can work in our lives? I was told at a meeting once that you can either let go and let it happen or hang on and get dragged along.  Also if you are not moving forward (or at least sideways), you are sliding backwards.  I have done nothing a lot and caused a lot of damage just by standing still.  Like stubbornly crossing my arms and saying, "nope, you can't make me."  Pride and stubbornness were my downfalls.  The Serenity Prayer has been my saving grace lately.  I must change the things I can, but not rage at things I cannot in a futile fight.
If things were meant to happen, things will happen.  But I have to participate in my life, not idly watch it go by.

What might be the benefits of allowing a Higher Power to work in my life? My best thinking landed me here.  We smart addicts think too much, and we get in our own way a lot.  My dad says we're the worst kind.  I couldn't do it on my own.  Time to let someone else guide me.  I'm still in the drivers seat, I just need a different map.  A GPS. Stop and ask for directions.  You'd think I was a man or something (snort). 

How do I feel, knowing that a Higher Power is caring for me and working in my life? A lot of people might say 'relieved' or 'inspired.'  Fuck that.  I'm apprehensive as hell.  I'm so used to being in control that letting go is a very scary thing.  To trust the Higher Power of my understanding is to admit defeat, which is what I essentially did in step one.  If She can get me this far, she can put me in opportunities I never thought possible.  Challenges that are coming at me when I think I'm down and out for the count are forcing me back to my feet in ways I never imagined I could do.  She keeps me on my toes I guess.  I find that introspection for myself is quite difficult, but then again if it were easy, that would be an insult to my intelligence or complexity, wouldn't it? har har har.

I'm running out of places I can hide from this
~Ghost out

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